I TRIED FOLLOWING KYLIE JENNERS VOGUE MAKEUP ROUTINE...
‘I Tried Kylie Jenner’s Makeup Routine For A Week—Here’s What Happened’
Let's be real: I have basically zero in common with , right down to our beauty routines. Whereas Kylie regularly dons a long set of acrylics, an , and a new hair color each week, I currently have dirt under my short, chipped fingernails, am masking chapped lips beneath a dollop of Aquaphor, and haven’t changed my no-frills hairstyle in over a decade.
But that doesn’t mean I, like millions of other teens and twentysomethings, don’t track the reality star’s every Insta step. With more than 84 million followers on the app and an equally impressive legion of fans on Snapchat, Jenner’s makeup tutorials and pouty selfies make her social media presence uber-addictive.
But for me, the motto is “Look, but don’t touch.” Jenner’s brazen beauty choices, while enticing, don't get me super inspired—mainly because I wouldn’t know how the heck to pull them off IRL. And I know I’m hardly alone in that hesitation.
That’s why I’ve opted to do the dirty—and embarrassing—work for you. To see if Kylie Jenner’s look could translate to real life, I opted to sport some of her favorite recent trends for one week: black matte lips, ridiculously long nails, peach eyeshadow, and overlined, plump lips. I promised to wear the trends to work, on Tinder dates, and simply running around in my daily life in New York City. Not surprisingly, hilarity ensued.
Trend One: Black matte lips
As I slowly moved the applicator of Kat Von D’s Everlasting Liquid Lipstick in Witches (, amazon.com) near my mouth before work, my hand began to tremble uncontrollably. I own—and have worn to work—several shades of liquid matte lipstick. “It’s just lipstick,” I coaxed myself as I gazed at my reflection. “It’s just lipstick.” After all, Kylie looks amazing in the color.
But upon arrival to the office that morning, I learned that it was not, in fact, just lipstick. I was met with bewildered expressions from acquaintances by the coffee machine. My close coworkers, however, weren’t afraid to start laying it on thick (no pun intended).
“Do you have a meeting this morning? I hope not, ‘cause you’re going to freak people the f-ck out,” one stated, although she also proclaimed that she loved the goth look.
“No, no,” another unapologetic coworker said, laughing. “The black lipstick has gotta go.”
“You should be in The Craft,” another suggested. I was tempted to start spreading salt around my office while chanting nonsensical phrases just to achieve the full effect.
The reception on social media when I posted pics was much warmer. I had to admit, the lipstick was striking and photogenic—but only with a pout. The second I began to speak or smile, the inner pinkness of my mouth provided a stark contrast with the “witchy” hue. I felt like I’d be better suited at a KISS concert.
Also, if you celebs wearing black lipstick (including Jenner), you’ll seldom find any with bared teeth. Now I know why.
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Trend Two: Long nails with art
“Now, if I cut these down any more,” my amazing nail technician Kesang at Valley Nails NYC said as she held clippers to my uber-long plastic nails. “They won’t be ‘Kylie’ nails anymore.”
Kesang knew I wanted to mimic one of Kylie’s manicures, as I brought in a picture of an acrylic set of hers I admired most—a reverse French manicure, with an upside-down nude triangle at the base. While the attention to detail was stunning, I started running into physical limitations the second the appointment ended—I couldn’t open a can of wet food for my cat, or manage to get my powder compact open. This was going to be a long, hellish week.
New nails in tow, I met up with a Tinder date that night. The acrylics immediately caught his eye. “Woah, those things are crazy!” he exclaimed. He went on to say how much he loved long nails on women. I’m surprised he even agreed to go out with me in the first place, as the nails were causing me to constantly misspell my messages to him—and it was taking twice as long to text back. But, I guess poor literacy wasn’t a dating dealbreaker for the dude, or he just prefers girlfriends to be physically limited in performing everyday tasks.
Back at work, while the nails drew plenty of compliments, they were also the source of annoyance for a few individuals near my desk.
“I CAN HEAR YOU CLACKING FROM HERE, JULIA,” an annoyed coworker said. But in my defense, I couldn’t touch the tips of my fingers to my keyboard, so I had to invent a new way to type—hitting buttons at half my normal typing speed with the tip of my pointy acrylic. I couldn’t help but wonder how much time Kylie spent on a keyboard throughout the day. I guessed it wasn’t a lot.
Nail a smoky eye with ease thanks to this video:
Trend Three: Peachy eyeshadow
From runways to red carpets to Miss Jenner’s Instagram, peach eyeshadow has been a hugely prevalent trend this past fall and winter—and was the least dramatic Kylie-inspired beauty trend of the bunch.
Despite the mostly positive reception, I was initially hesitant to try the hue. I’m no fan of the harshness of red/peachy eyeshadow, and paired with my Irish-pink complexion, I feared my experiment might be mistaken for an unsightly rash.
Not the case at all. Too Faced’s Sweet Pea Eyeshadow Collection (, ulta.com) provided all the necessary hues to build an earthy, sweet, peachy eye color. Bonus—it smelled like peaches! To ensure I nailed Kylie’s look perfectly, I downloaded her app and tried to mimic her peach makeup tutorial.
Although the bright peach look probably won’t become a regular part of my beauty routine, it did provide a fun, sweet way to mix up my everyday look. (Don't forget the mascara with your peachy shadow—we like this from the Women's Health Boutique!)
Trend Four: Plumped-up, overlined lips
As the Too Faced Lip Injection Extreme (, sephora.com) lip plumper began to settle on my lips, I couldn’t help but wonder how safe and healthy it was to have something tingling, and subsequently swelling, your face. But the alternative—having lip injections like our girl, Kylie—seemed infinitely more undesirable.
Once the plumper dried, I extended my lip liner laughably far from my actual lips (per Kylie's tutorial on her app, of course), and began to fill in my lips with a Kylie Cosmetics Lip Kit in Candy K (, kyliecosmetics.com). By completion, the plumped-up lips and over-extended liner sure made me feel silly.
Unlike the posh photogenic nature of the black matte lipstick, the look didn’t translate too well over Snapchat. “Girl,” one friend messaged me when I sent her the photo. “You look ridiculous.”
Of course, there were some admirers (I think). The bagel guy was especially friendly that morning, and I did feel a slightly heavier gaze from a few men I encountered throughout the day (which is not necessarily a good thing?).
Another unexpected consequence? When your lip liner extends beyond, you know, your actual lips, you’re more likely to get color in more places—including your coffee cup and chin. Not so hot.
Are Kylie and I still kindred beauty spirits? Probably not
There’s a reason why Kylie Jenner is a universal beauty icon, as her strategically-filtered photos could make a unibrow and trash bag dress look vogue. In the real world—attending a work meeting, going to the gym, or trying to impress a complete stranger on a Tinder date—that level of fashion- and beauty-forwardness doesn’t translate too well, at least for me. Then again, when I wore the black lipstick, one coworker mentioned that it wouldn’t be as shocking if I wore more drastic colors and makeup trends regularly.
So while it’s certain that I’m due for a style switch-up, I might limit that change to colors that don’t frighten small children.
Video: I tried following a Kylie Jenner Makeup Tutorial... Realizing things😂...
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